Particle Collisions, Manifestation, and the Power of Belief with Alicia Trusty

Alicia Trusty

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[00:00:19] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Thank you.

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[00:00:27] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: start.

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[00:00:36] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: with. Amelia grace

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[00:00:38] . That's right. So today we are doing our 4th of July celebration episode.

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[00:00:51] Jeff Nesbitt: yes, it is. And we're very excited, Amelia and I, which, by the way, if you're unaware, ?

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[00:01:13] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: and, um, sparklers,

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[00:01:16] We got snakes and sparkler. We actually didn't get snakes. That's a Joe dirt reference. Yeah. have we ever watched Joe dirt? No, we'll have to watch that when you're a little bit older.

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[00:01:30] Jeff Nesbitt: five. Maybe five, maybe five, maybe 13. I don't know. Or 10, maybe 10. Ten's a good one. Joe. Dirt's a bit of a grown up movie, but it's a great movie.

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[00:01:48] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Um, I got it in a not,

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[00:02:04] Yeah.

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[00:02:07] Jeff Nesbitt: all about it. Well, what does 4th of July mean to you?

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[00:02:20] Jeff Nesbitt: There's so many good things. Yeah. Do you know where 4th of July came from? Like the day where, why we celebrate?

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[00:02:34] Jeff Nesbitt: Okay. Yeah. I'll take that answer. That's a good answer. So do you know what independence means?

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[00:02:54] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah. That's pretty good. Um, do you, oh, you're kicking something. That's [00:03:00] my shoe. Okay. I could hear it on the recording.

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[00:03:21] Yeah. Yeah. So we, uh, we decided we're gonna be our own country. Oh, do you know what year that was? 17,

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[00:03:28] Jeff Nesbitt: 6. Very very good. How did you know that?

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[00:03:36] Jeff Nesbitt: Your practice. What is your practice? I use practice. You're you're yelling a little bit.

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[00:03:46] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Fireworks they're loud and noisy and fun. Ah,

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[00:04:02] Sorry, Christmas

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[00:04:05] Jeff Nesbitt: Christmas is your favorite. Huh? Present presents is good, but you know, it's even better than presents. What? Physical presence. Yeah. Like being outside with your family, don't touch the mic tea being outside with your family at the beach and lighting, fireworks, digging holes, throwing fireworks, shooting bottle rockets, all that stuff.

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[00:04:58] Okay. I can't reach though. [00:05:00] Or the Buddha or one of those two things.

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[00:05:05] Jeff Nesbitt: Playdoh. What do you name in that green dragon? You need a name? Um,

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[00:05:14] Jeff Nesbitt: have a name. Hey, bonus question. What was the Buddha's name before he was the Buddha? Hmm, Nina Nina close. That was prince Suha. Did you know he was a prince?

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[00:05:38] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: the Buddha show? No, it had, um,

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[00:05:51] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: And, um, she was CR the girl was crying on a rock.

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[00:05:58] Not me, not [00:06:00] you, but

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[00:06:02] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah, just

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[00:06:06] Jeff Nesbitt: It's been a while since I cried on a rock

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[00:06:23] I I'm pretty sure. And even if it's not legal, people are doing it. There's a reservation not far from here in this county. So people go out to, to, they get their fireworks. They. Bombs and rockets and all kinds of exploding and sparkly things. Okay. So

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[00:06:41] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah.

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[00:07:03] Me and me and my brother, Jake, uncle Jake. We used to have a lot of fun on 4th of July. So grandpa would take us up to, to, to the Indian reservation. And he, even one time he got the guys to go take us behind and sell us the good stuff. You know what I mean? You know what I'm talking about when I say the good stuff?

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[00:07:29] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: everyone's gonna love

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[00:07:34] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: bet. They're gonna think. Who is that talking?

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[00:07:45] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Yeah,

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[00:07:48] One time. We took one of those M one thousands and we put it in a, I think it was a Toyota Celica And we closed all the doors and windows and we lit that thing and we ran and

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[00:08:07] It buckled the roof and blew out every window. It was bad ass. Excuse my language. Is it? I'm sorry. I wish you were there because then you just know how bad ass it was. And I wouldn't have to say that bad word, so I'm sorry. But it needed to be said it's okay. I apologize. It's okay. Can you forgive me? Yes.

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[00:08:31] Jeff Nesbitt: I'll bleep it. Okay, I'm sorry, audience. You don't have to hear that language. Yes. The salty language is not what we're about here on ramble on the river, ramble by the river. My

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[00:08:41] Jeff Nesbitt: any of your kids. Don't say that to your kids.

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[00:08:46] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Yeah. And don't do anything. That's not fair to your kids because that will make them say

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[00:09:04] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Yeah. And my dad and my mom say something that's not fair. So I say

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[00:09:13] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: And they do a lot of things that are on purpose. Like what, like slamming people into the table, which my sister did to me. Your parents

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[00:09:25] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: But sisters do .

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[00:09:29] But I think it was, it was mostly an accident.

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[00:09:37] Jeff Nesbitt: You did hit your tooth. But she was sorry.

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[00:09:43] Jeff Nesbitt: hurt anymore. It hurts when you chomp though. Yeah It's been two weeks. . It's probably not gonna hurt much longer.

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[00:09:56] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: bubble that if the bubble comes up, [00:10:00] like not the bubbles that you swallow

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[00:10:08] Yes. Can I take a look, lean your head back, back? Not up.

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[00:10:21] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: because just of me.

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[00:10:31] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Yeah. Just when I'm hurt you guys take care of

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[00:10:37] Yeah. Pretty much all the time. Yeah. But much just like, Hey, at least.

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[00:10:45] Jeff Nesbitt: Wow. I'm noticing some, some beef with Elsa what's going on. Nothing. I thought you guys were super tight.

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[00:10:55] Jeff Nesbitt: Amelia, you can talk about it on this show.

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[00:11:03] What do you mean? That's weird. I'm not talking for a little while, but you can still talk to me.

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[00:11:17] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: She gets to go see grandma Bonnie, and it's not fair.

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[00:11:30] Yeah,

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[00:11:32] Jeff Nesbitt: grandmas, but do you know what Elsa had to work really hard for that. And it wasn't really that fun. She had to go through some hard stuff to get an extra grandma and an extra dad. Well,

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[00:11:45] Jeff Nesbitt: him first. I know. That's why, that's why that's her, her biological father. And

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[00:11:53] And that's not fear,

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[00:12:15] You know, he's just, I mean, just a standup dude. And that's you, is it? Oh, that's right. That's right. It is me. So she has two daddies now, , and it. To you, it might sound like she's really lucky to have two daddies, but to her, even though she loves both of her daddies, it's still kind of hard sometimes. Cuz that's, that's not a, not always an ideal situation.

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[00:12:49] That's.

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[00:12:56] Jeff Nesbitt: the way it is. When your little sister, your big sister does all the cool stuff [00:13:00] and then you want to do it and you do it later. Sometimes mm-hmm

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[00:13:08] Jeff Nesbitt: I'm sorry. Okay. Elsa doesn't really do the Grammy Tory stuff though.

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[00:13:36] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: talking about this?

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[00:14:11] So if you've ever driven on the beach, you know, You have your hard sand, which is like where the tide has receded and the, the sand is packed and you can drive on that in a two wheel drive vehicle. No problem. A little up higher. You have your soft sand, which is dry. It's loose. It's it's just not really.

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[00:14:43] We have the same spot every year. We're gonna get there. So he's just flying through this soft sand. You know, you have to work with the tides and we're trying to get out there early. We don't wanna get stuck in the wrong spot. The plan is you just basically beach ourselves, let the van get stuck in our spot.

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[00:15:15] They'd pull us. And we'd drive back to the hard sand and, and go home. So that was the experience every year. And it was a fucking blast. Oh, sorry. It's okay. I'll uh, I'll bleep that out.

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[00:15:34] I won't

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[00:15:36] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: And you fail. Don't say any CU wordss a real bummer.

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[00:15:47] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: okay. Just say that to your fans and not me.

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[00:15:51] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: You can say, you're

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[00:15:57] But it was, it was a blast. It was a [00:16:00] really good time and I loved it every year. Okay. You okay. One time though, I was throwing, uh, firecrackers. you know what firecrackers are? No, they're little tiny bombs. They go BA 'em. Oh. And they have a fast fuse on 'em. It's just like a little scrap of paper. Ow. And I lit it.

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[00:16:34] People get their hands and fingers blown off by fireworks every year.

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[00:16:41] Jeff Nesbitt: that? I never did lose a finger.

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[00:16:45] Jeff Nesbitt: your hand? I got 'em both still right here. See count 'em 1,

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[00:16:51] Jeff Nesbitt: 2 hands.

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[00:16:57] Jeff Nesbitt: to you? Nothing. I guess that's kind [00:17:00] of a boring story.

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[00:17:17] I hate that. Please don't do that. Please. Don't do that. You're gonna light each other's clothes on. You're gonna, the thing is gonna get hot and burn your hand. Just put the fucking thing on the ground and, and light it and enjoy it. Don't you don't need to be that involved,

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[00:17:36] Uh, uh, oh, if it get too hot, sleep into the water or a shade. That brings the song again to the, uh, the best swimming in it.

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[00:17:57] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: still, oh, bring the song, [00:18:00] this sing song with me. Uh,

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[00:18:11] Jeff Nesbitt: I, I thought you said and sing the song with me is that's just part of the song. Yeah. But it's a solo.

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[00:18:29] keep forgetting. It's just the

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[00:18:51] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Uhuh. Oh, come on. That's enough. Let's go chat a parking along, uh, come on, sing along and,

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[00:19:05] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Uh, no, uh, oh, in the air, come along. Sing. Come up on,

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[00:19:59] I have leave to [00:20:00] go to work. This is day go.

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[00:20:20] Anyway,

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[00:20:28] So get ready for some weird shit to start happening. We're gonna have Manela effects. Hey mills, you're interrupting. Sorry. You're interrupting a host of the show. Sorry. That's a quick way to get banned from the show. Sorry. Okay. And you know what? We love your songs. We love your banter. We're not, Hey, watch it.

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[00:20:49] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: you like to two here's some more songs?

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[00:21:09] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: No, I don't. And do

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[00:21:17] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: all the concern is

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[00:21:24] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Yep.

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[00:21:26] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: say? Ready?

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[00:21:29] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: According to the U.S. Sun, the new CERN Hadron Collider

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[00:21:44] Spare speeds. .

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[00:21:52] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: on.

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[00:21:59] are abounding as

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[00:22:04] Jeff Nesbitt: 5th large Hadron Collider experiment was set To

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[00:22:11] Jeff Nesbitt: unprecedented

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[00:22:13] Jeff Nesbitt: energy. The European organization, European

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[00:22:18] Jeff Nesbitt: for nuclear research. So nuclear, the European European

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[00:22:26] Jeff Nesbitt: organization Is celebrating its.

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[00:22:30]

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[00:22:31] Jeff Nesbitt: restarting it's large had drawn Collider after it was

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[00:22:38] Jeff Nesbitt: The European organization also known as CERN operates the largest particle physics laboratory in the world. CERN's main function is to provide the particle accelerators and other infrastructure needed for high energy physics. Don't kick, please. That's such a long one. You, you don't have to do it. Okay.

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[00:23:26] And

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[00:23:35] Jeff Nesbitt: No. Thank you. Uh, the a LHC I'm just kidding. We do wanna hear the song at the end. Okay. The LHC, which is the world's largest and most powerful particle accelerator is at the center of conspiracy theories surrounding CERN.

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[00:24:00] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: to sing along.

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[00:24:11] Everything is fine. Someone said on Twitter. Oh my God. I hate when they do that. Okay. I shouldn't have even included that because there's a uncited source from Twitter. Okay. A lot of people, basically a lot of people are on Twitter are saying, oh, what if CN opens a portal to hell or something?

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[00:24:41] One theory suggests that the gravitron may move in all dimensions, not just the ones we live in. The start of the LHC will be streamed live on CERN's social media channels. So This will mark the launch of the new physics season at the Institute's flagship accelerator. And this comes 10 years after the groundbreaking research that was presented on the Higgs [00:25:00] boon to a packed CERN auditorium.

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[00:25:19] I'm excited about it. I personally don't believe that it's gonna start a black hole or, or anything like that. Nothing terrible. And I don't have a conspiracy theory to give you guys, sorry about this one. I just think it's cool science. So that being said, watch out for black holes, you know, worm holes and crazy things.

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[00:25:51] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: are you ready for the song?

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[00:25:58] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: I wanna say sing [00:26:00] along.

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[00:26:04] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: And sing along.

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[00:26:10] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: No, I'm sing the song with me.

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[00:26:15] Jeff Nesbitt: can you just lay me a beat please? No.

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[00:26:26] loud to what you

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[00:26:30] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: was trying to take a turn, but I was just singing,

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[00:26:40] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: don't wanna sing. I don't wanna have

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[00:26:44] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: I like having music, my own word. I

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[00:26:52] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: I forgot

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[00:26:56] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: forgot what I was

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[00:26:59] Guess what? That's the [00:27:00] theme of this show? Oh, that's what we do all day long on this show. Oh, we just start something, we forget, we start something better. We forget we start something even better than that. And then we forget about it because we found something better to talk about and we forget, and that's just how we go.

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[00:27:19] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: I know. It's just, I wanna say something and I stop going

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[00:27:30] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: You,

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[00:27:36] Okay. My guest today is Alicia trustee. Alicia is a very interesting person. I have known her a long time. She was a, my younger sister's age in school and or close to it. I think they were the same age, And I was the same age as her older sister. So she's in one of those families that I've just always known and she's a great person.

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[00:28:14] So I hope you guys enjoy it without further ado.

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[00:28:19] Jeff Nesbitt: It is hard.

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[00:28:24] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: Without further ado, please enjoy this interview. This interview with Alicia Trusty very

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[00:28:35] Amelia Grace Nesbitt: of July. Would you like to end with one of my songs? Go and songs bring along.

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[00:28:55] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah. All right. Bye everybody. Enjoy the show.[00:29:00]

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[00:00:22] can you tell me who you are? And, uh, just so I can make sure your sound is good. Yes,

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[00:00:28] Jeff Nesbitt: All right, pull it a little bit closer. Cool. Cause you're I think you're gonna be a little bit quieter than me. Okay. That sounds really good. Okay, cool. Perfect. I think we're good to go. All right, let's do this.

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[00:00:59] Like you see a [00:01:00] lot of influencers. I hate to even use that word because it's so irritating. Yeah. To most people , but you see a lot of, uh, influencers, posting stuff, memes positive with just the positivity stuff. But those don't seem like real people. Yeah. They seem like perfect people with perfect lives who happen to know this wisdom.

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[00:01:53] It comes across as genuine. And like, this is a person who is working on herself and who has figured some [00:02:00] shit out, maybe not everything, but you're working on it. And the process is like, the journey is the process is the goal. Like, yeah, it's a, it's a positive way to try to construct your life. Oh,

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[00:02:11] Yeah. Um, I think, you know, one, when I was traveling, I was recently traveling overseas for like two months and, um, someone said to me, so like, are you an influencer? And I was like, um, no, , I don't consider myself like, you know, on that, like length that wavelength. Um, but like, for me, it's just about like, I wanna help people.

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[00:02:54] Um, I like think that is a big missing piece and to actually have like [00:03:00] steps or a process of how to do that and to just be like real, you know, I have nothing to hide. Right. Like I just wanna show up as I am and far from perfect. Um, and also like far from figured out, I for sure agree with that. Like, you know, I'm, it's, it is the journey like that is the point.

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[00:03:19] Jeff Nesbitt: do you think it's even possible to get it all figured out or is it just gonna be a continuous journey? I think

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[00:03:40] Um, they're all like, you know, moms or just these older people who still, even though I look at them and I'm like, oh my gosh, I wanna be where you are. Right. They're still going through their own processes. Like recently, one of the people that I work with, she's a [00:04:00] life coach. She's a heartbreak coach. She, um, and is my coach.

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[00:04:19] It's like we also like reach different levels of like awareness. And like, I, I feel like it's like, as our consciousness expands, right? Like our perspective expands

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[00:04:34] Alicia Trusty: I think. Right. Like, I mean, it's part of the, like the more individually we can expand, then the more the collective expands,

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[00:04:41] 100%. I feel that as truth. What, like, when I'm trying to expand my own perceptions, my own, just ability to make sense of the world. I feel like I'm doing the work of humanity. Like we're trying to move forward as a species and it's fucking hard because we've advanced a really long [00:05:00] way. No other animal that we know of has come this far.

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[00:05:10] Alicia Trusty: for sure. And like, what's so interesting. I think about a lot about that is like, we are so evolved and we're so like expanded as a society yet. We're like, we've gotten kind of away from like this universal truth and this like, um, I can't quite think of the word for it, but it's like.

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[00:05:40] Jeff Nesbitt: human thing. Do you find it hard to find the right terminology when you're talking about this stuff? Because so many words have baggage and like especially the new age stuff, people get so turned off so quickly.

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[00:06:09] Uh, I like this stuff with some mystery baked in.

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[00:06:31] And I was like, no, no, no. And so I like found a different way to like talk about it to them. But so what is codependency? So codependency at its core, there's like, it's very nuanced. I like to always preface it with that. Um, but at its core, it's, you know, sacrificing one's self in order to care for another.

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[00:06:53] Alicia Trusty: right. He was codependent. Oh my gosh. Is that, is that the case? I mean, I haven't really examined that too deeply. Um,

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[00:07:08] Alicia Trusty: codependence?

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[00:07:33] They won't receive love. They won't be accepted. Like being codependent is, um, you do these things, right? Like people pleasing is a big part of it. And it's not because like, you think people love you for who you are. It's because you're afraid that if you don't do these things that they won't love you, like, they love you for what you do, not who you are.

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[00:07:51] Jeff Nesbitt: which is not a healthy state to be in. I assume.

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[00:08:05] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah. Yeah. And fear does not make good decisions. And it does not allow you to grow. Like you cannot grow.

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[00:08:19] Alicia Trusty: from there. For sure. For sure. That's like my biggest thing with helping people with codependency is, um, everyone has the, like, I think it's just a human right to feel worthy in our own skin.

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[00:08:53] Jeff Nesbitt: you know, why is it so hard to just value ourselves?

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[00:09:11] Yeah. And then when you go on to try to do something, those beliefs are going to completely limit what you're able to do. Yeah. For why do you think that happens?

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[00:09:28] It is a good one because it's real. And whether, like, whether your trauma is, I was in fourth grade and I worked really hard on this paper and my teacher said. Wow. This was a terrible paper. And you're you internalize that or your trauma was bigger because of family dynamics or whatever, or you had a parent who was like hypercritical or, you know, um, like in my case, it's like alcoholism was kind of where my codependency was created and learning to like step away from that and heal that there was a lot of feelings though, of unworthiness.

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[00:10:06] Jeff Nesbitt: that a weird moment when you realize that you're like, oh shit, what have I been doing? Like, this is not, I don't have to do this. Like, you don't have to carry that with you.

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[00:10:36] Oh, for sure. It's a, it's a comfortable prison.

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[00:10:50] It's gonna nourish you and help you grow when you it's a trick. When you get in that water, you're gonna be like, what the fuck is this? . Yeah.

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[00:10:58] Alicia Trusty: Right? Exactly. [00:11:00] Exactly. It takes like it's like exposure therapy, right? Like it takes, um, A little bit of time, you know, it takes, it takes.

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[00:11:29] It's like, okay. I'm, I'm like on it, I'm doing my work. And then there might be like a time where it's like, maybe I don't have something in my life actively pushing me to like, heal or do that work. And that's when, like the trick of being disciplined, I guess, and really sticking to something comes into play.

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[00:12:12] Um, because I've been around my family for the last few years.

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[00:12:23] Alicia Trusty: anybody. You know, it's both right. Like they are, but at the same time, like that's where my safety is. That's where I built this, where I learned codependency.

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[00:12:56] And then like rework them because our thoughts create our feelings and our [00:13:00] feelings create our, um, actions and our actions create our results. So that's

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[00:13:15] This is a thought, this is not a fact. This is not, I don't have to be this thought. It's just something that's passing through me as, as I'm a conduit. Yes. This thought I didn't create this thought. I didn't choose to have it. It's just here. Exactly. And you can observe it and then let it pass. Yeah, exactly.

[: 00:13:31

[00:13:47] They still feel so connected and identified with the issue and with the identity that they've built to accommodate the issue. Yes. That they don't ever even see a path to health. Yeah. And, and when I say health, I, [00:14:00] I really consider health to be a, a multifaceted thing. It doesn't just involve your physical health.

[: 00:14:05

[00:14:26] How are they working all that has to work together in perfect harmony for you to actually achieve what is considered to be good, you know, quality health. And that is so hard to do in a world where you're just constantly bombarded with different stimuli and different opportunities to fuck yourself up.

[: 00:14:43

[00:14:43] Alicia Trusty: It's everywhere. It is. It's everywhere. And I totally agree like it is. I think that that's one of the things about like Western, I mean, it's like the world at this point, the modern world that like really bums me out a little bit is like, we're a little disconnected, completely a [00:15:00] lot disconnected, right.

[: 00:15:01

[00:15:23] Yeah. You know, and it like comes back to that thing of like, fear is not a good place to move from. Um, but I think spiritual health too is. Is kind of like a gateway to the rest of these healths, right?

[: 00:15:36

[00:15:41] Okay, cool. Perfect. Um, yeah, I agree. So spiritual health, what do you, what does that mean to you?

[: 00:15:47

[00:15:51] Jeff Nesbitt: I can get, because to a lot of people it's religion and they're, and they're turning this off right now. They're like, I don't want that shit but that is not what I consider spiritual

[: 00:15:58

[00:15:58] Yeah. No. And [00:16:00] like, so I can get pretty out there. Right? Like, um, like spirituality for me is like a big, a big encompassing thing. Like I found really, like, I hate using the word spirituality actually, because a lot of people do assume, like, I, I do mean religion, right? Oh, you're just packed with the holy spirit.

[: 00:16:21

[00:16:40] Um, but for me, like spirituality is like being connected to the earth, being connected to like my, my, my higher consciousness. My soul's highest good. Like my guides, um, you know, like yesterday I was telling my sister. I was like, yeah, I was doing a little meditation with my shaman and I had a vision [00:17:00] about a lake.

[: 00:17:00

[00:17:19] Um, and like I'm, hopefully one day would like to incorporate that and how I can like be of service to people. Obviously I would not like, I feel like that's a slippery slope to be like, oh, I'm a shaman, but if you're white, for sure. Yeah, for sure. And that's where it's like, I don't wanna, I don't wanna do that, but I do.

[: 00:17:35

[00:17:39] Alicia Trusty: greater. Exactly. Yeah. And like, you know, use the elementals to help people because like water has purpose, rocks have purpose. Trees are alive. Like they talk to each other. I know. I love that. That underground.

[: 00:17:54

[00:17:55] Alicia Trusty: network.

[: 00:17:56

[00:17:58] Jeff Nesbitt: It's, it's the internet that existed [00:18:00] long before the internet existed. It's so cool. It's really cool. I I'm in that same boat. I love that kind of stuff. I, I think spirituality is very important. I think it's a crucial part of what makes us human and, and the ability to connect is, is part of that.

[: 00:18:14

[00:18:40] It's, it's something about spindle cells and mirror neurons, and just it's part of us. It's part of who we are. It is. And people want to ignore it or, or maybe not ignore it, but they wanna just assume that that's all there is. I think there's actually more, I think that we have latent abilities that people haven't been able to do for a very long time or, or there may some people [00:19:00] who can like out of the 8 billion people on this planet, maybe a handful of them can do some really cool shit.

[: 00:19:05

[00:19:10] Alicia Trusty: fascinating. Yeah. Like this, this is something that like has intrigued me. And for the longest time I felt like, you know, um, I, I felt I judged myself for like, being like, this is, this is like valid or, or doing the research on it and like really tapping into it.

[: 00:19:26

[00:19:54] Something in my, in my plane that I'm unaware of. Right. Like says that there's medicine there for me. Um, [00:20:00] but like, there are so many perceptions that like we don't have and, and can't even see. And I think one of the things that like keeps us from maybe dropping into these or accepting these is like, we wanna be able to box everything up and you can't really box that shit up.

[: 00:20:14

[00:20:15] Jeff Nesbitt: not at all. Yeah. And when you try it, it doesn't like it. No, it, it gives you exceptions. It, it just doesn't want to be boxed up. It's something that we're, I don't know if we're supposed to completely grasp it. Right. But just the attempt at trying to put together some kind of a cohesive view of what this stuff is, is what's important to me cuz I, I don't really want to ever feel like I know it all.

[: 00:20:36

[00:20:49] Alicia Trusty: arrogance. Oh, for sure. Like, I was just having a conversation with an older person the other day.

[: 00:20:54

[00:21:09] Yeah. You experience new experiences. You have new things arise. I love this like phrase that the subconscious will only make conscious what the conscious can handle. And so like to think that like at. That we just like figure ourselves out and figure the whole world out one day. Like, and we just arrive somewhere.

[: 00:21:27

[00:21:30] Jeff Nesbitt: I, I love that. What you just said that the, can you say that again?

[: 00:21:33

[00:21:38] Jeff Nesbitt: So that speaks right to the idea that there is this vast ocean of impulses and motivations and memories that we don't have immediate access to.

[: 00:21:47

[00:22:05] And I realized a long time ago that I have no idea. Yeah. We tell ourselves stories. We tell ourselves stories to make sense of our behaviors, but the true motivations for those behaviors are most likely ingrained habitual or cultural. And you might not have any idea how they got there. For sure. I think that's fascinating.

[: 00:22:23

[00:22:24] Alicia Trusty: It definitely like, you know, really, I think it also comes to like the point of like being able to look in the mirror and be like, wait, and like dive deeper beside like, beyond just the, the, um, like initial like, oh, I do that. This, you know? Yeah. Like, oh, I've been this way, my whole life. It's like, there's no motivation behind it.

[: 00:22:44

[00:22:48] Jeff Nesbitt: Explore it. Examine. Yeah. Dig deep. Do you have any books or particular people who talk about this stuff that you are particularly fond of?

[: 00:22:57

[00:23:08] And it's a really interesting book. Um, I can't think of the author right now, but, um, I also, so like kind of what started to like, get me to look at my thoughts. Um, is this woman named Byron Katie? So she has a book called loving what is, and she also has like an amazing website. It's called the work. Um, it's like the work.com or if you just Google the work of Byron Katie, what about a link?

[: 00:23:33

[00:24:00] I think I know everything. And I think that my thoughts are true and they're not true. And so she has this book that kind of like talks about how it's this meditation of like. Can, you know, like your thoughts are actually true. Right? And then she has this like process you take yourself through and it kind of helps us tap into our, like our mind in a way that like gets us to go deeper past the initial, like things we just throw out there.

[: 00:24:24

[00:24:42] I also just love like, so Jane Mayer, she does a lot of like singing healing, um, and like works with like the ferns. Um, she offers. Is that a band?

[: 00:24:54

[00:24:54] Alicia Trusty: plant, uh, no, it's, it's a person. Oh, it's a person named the ferns. No, no, no, [00:25:00] no. The ferns are what she works with the plant. Like literally they're plant.

[: 00:25:03

[00:25:10] Jeff Nesbitt: terms of plant consciousness. They're one of the more lively plants. Yeah. Like I know that sounds crazy listeners. Don't don't turn this off. No, seriously. Don't they don't, they don't speak English, but they're definitely conscious.

[: 00:25:22

[00:25:24] Jeff Nesbitt: This is scientifically validated. It is, it is like many, many, many times, right? Yeah. Have you seen the, the rice study where, I mean, they do it on TikTok and Instagram all the time, but take two jars with white rice and you fill, 'em both up halfway with cooked rice to one of the jars you project love.

[: 00:25:42

[00:26:11] And after a certain amount of time, the jar w that has been treated hatefully is black and moldy and rotten. And this has, it's like actually worked in a lab. Yeah. And the same thing happens when they do studies, where they talk like that to growing plants. Yeah. And the plant that has been treated lovingly thrives and the plant that hasn.

[: 00:26:30

[00:26:31] Alicia Trusty: exactly. Like I haven't seen the rice one. That's fascinating, but I have seen plant once, like where, you know, they play, um, like I actually saw something where they played like death metal and um, like this plant was in sun and they played death metal to it and like talked down to it because there's like a lot of like energy in music.

[: 00:26:50

[00:27:07] Jeff Nesbitt: like, yeah. Oh, it did it with no light, no light.

[: 00:27:09

[00:27:30] Like that's crazy from underneath. There's no light down there. It just knows where the sun is. And it's just, just like, Hey, I got the tools. I'm gonna punch a hole in this road and go get some light plants are they're much more aware than, than people give them credit for look at a Venus fly trap. Yeah.

[: 00:27:45

[00:27:53] Alicia Trusty: we have. Yeah. I think that's one of the things that I've really. Uh, opened up [00:28:00] to, is that like, and kind of, as I've opened up to it, I've like looked at things so differently is that we have been looking at things through human consciousness.

[: 00:28:07

[00:28:29] Jeff Nesbitt: it.

[: 00:28:29

[00:28:53] And I, and I don't like that feeling at all. Yeah. It's it makes you feel very alone and isolated and [00:29:00] unsafe because we're not meant to be isolated and alone, but at the same time, I don't wanna be part of a big boring collective that doesn't want to investigate the secrets of the universe. Right. So it, it's important to find people who are into what you're into for that reason.

[: 00:29:14

[00:29:14] Alicia Trusty: for sure. And balance, right. Like don't unpack and live there, right. Like yeah, exactly. Explore. Sit with it. See how it feels and then come back. Yeah. Then leave because yeah, exactly. You don't wanna get stuck in those places for sure. Yeah.

[: 00:29:26

[00:29:34] But I mean, there are people who have spent 30 years meditating in a cave and there're still sane. Right. They're still, I mean, they're viewed as like sacred people because they, they were able to do that and they accomplished things and built structures in their brains that are incredible. Yeah. Like the, the kind of power that people who are really trained meditators have to change their brain.

[: 00:29:54

[00:30:28] Mm-hmm, like for whatever reason, but there are a lot of times when that's not the case. Yeah. And you may still want to have a relationship with those people and in a. Vast number of cases, not only are the people who caused the trauma, also your like your social group, but they're your source of safety as well.

[: 00:30:47

[00:31:07] Alicia Trusty: Yeah. That's a great question. So sort of the way that I always approach, like, because I, I mean, I've like lived this, I live it currently. Um, and I, I really do think that there's like two ways this goes right. And like, obviously there's more than two, but like, um, really, I think it's important to be mindful of the fact that there are certain relationships, right?

[: 00:31:29

[00:31:56] Like. I met a guy like whatever. And if she [00:32:00] doesn't have the capacity for that, she's like not gonna be able to be there for you. Right. She'll shut you down, whatever it is. And that's like going to the hardware store for bread. Um, and when you get inside, you're like, wow, there's only hammers and nails.

[: 00:32:11

[00:32:38] Right. Yeah. Right. So like one of the things that I always try to keep in mind with people is like one, as I'm talking to people about these things is like, okay, what's your family dynamic? Like, is this person actually like a safe person? Is it a little T is it a big T um, as far as trauma goes, cuz. [00:33:00] If someone's like physically abusive, for example, and like still to this day, like, even as you've grown up to be an adult, they're like not a safe person, then you have to like, decide, okay, do I really want a relationship with this person?

[: 00:33:12

[00:33:20] Jeff Nesbitt: Um, and they'll know if they cross 'em

[: 00:33:22

[00:33:35] Like the ability to see people for who they are and, you know, our inner child, like often as, as adults, we're able to see like, oh, I really thought my parents were these people. And I use like the example of parents, because that's where,

[: 00:33:49

[00:33:50] Alicia Trusty: parents. It is for me, like that's where my work has been is with my parents.

[: 00:33:53

[00:34:16] So one the compassion of like, okay, I can accept you for who you are. And then also now, like, it's my responsibility to. Forgive you to also take care of myself to also like, be, be there for my inner child. Like it's called, like growing yourself back up to say like, Hey, I know you're like wanting love. I know you're wanting an apology from your parents, but you don't need that anymore.

[: 00:34:42

[00:34:58] We don't need [00:35:00] to participate in these things because I can take care of you and I can love you. And I can

[: 00:35:05

[00:35:05] Jeff Nesbitt: you what you need. And the eye in that is not that inner child, the eye in that is the adult. Exactly, exactly. That's interesting. I, I did a really effective meditation that I will, I'm gonna share it.

[: 00:35:16

[00:35:41] Right. And part of that has been doing work, just learning about my inner child. I, which I didn't even really give a lot of thought to before, because it sounds so like. Childish . Yeah. Yeah, because it is, uh, what I didn't realize is that I [00:36:00] was pretty much still letting my inner child call the shots right.

[: 00:36:03

[00:36:26] I, I talked about it all the time. I would be, I could talk about my abuse and laugh about it. Yeah. Up until I was like almost 30 years old. And then once I became a dad that all changed and I realized like, that shit was not funny at all. There's no comedy in it to me at all anymore. The abuse that I, uh, kind of experienced and watched my siblings experience.

[: 00:36:46

[00:37:05] And, and it's like, if I put myself in that position, I'm just like, I, I couldn't imagine mm-hmm um, I couldn't imagine wanting to just letting my kids experience those kind of negative emotions and being okay with it. Mm-hmm so that fucked me up. Yeah. Like to know that. My dad for whatever reason was okay with it.

[: 00:37:24

[00:37:43] Like we've moved on and, but it's not over for me because when I'm wrestling with my kid, all of a sudden I have a, a flashback and I start crying. Yeah. I'm just like, oh fuck. I can't let this be. I can't let this be my life. This can't be the dad that I am. I can't be this fragile person. I gotta figure this out.

[: 00:37:59

[00:38:19] So it's really effective. Part of that was she's like, you need to do some inner child work. You need to figure out what's going on there. And so I started doing some reading and I had an idea of trying something. So I would pull out one of these memories from my memory bank, where that was like, Scary that it would bring up physical feelings in my body that I'm just like, holy shit.

[: 00:38:42

[00:39:13] It doesn't constantly intrude into your, your physical experience of the world. So the way a traumatic memory is stored, it's emotional, it's highly physical. You feel it. And it's in flashes. It's not in a narrative linear timeline, it's in bits and pieces and some of it's large gaps are missing and it's like, yeah, it's, it's fucking confusing.

[: 00:39:35

[00:39:56] And then I, uh, I. Place [00:40:00] myself as an adult, as the person I am today into that reality in my memory where me and my brother were just little boys and we had just gotten in trouble, uh, and you know, been punished. And now we were outside in our Ford and we were just like hanging out. And so I literally, in my mind drove my work truck that I drive today every day, just to anchor myself into this, this consciousness yeah.

[: 00:40:25

[00:40:41] Yeah. And it's, it feels very real. Um, I still have dreams where cars pull up to my house in the middle of the night and I have to run out the back mm-hmm like, it's, that didn't happen. Right. Like, I don't know why that is. I mean, I, it kind of happened actually but not [00:41:00] exactly like that. A car pulled up to my window in the middle of the night.

[: 00:41:03

[00:41:25] Playing. And it kept trying to rip me into the memory mm-hmm and I started feeling it and I would start to feel like I couldn't breathe. And then I just had to take a couple slow breaths, like really, really actively bring myself back to now. Yeah. To here now. Like that is not you, that's not, you treat this kid, like it's a, a kid you're trying to help.

[: 00:41:44

[00:42:04] And since then, I, I can now think about that incident without having a big emotional episode. I don't, it doesn't feel like I'm there anymore. Yeah. Yeah. And when I like, yeah, it's it was very handy. So try that. If you're, if you're having issues have you

[: 00:42:21

[00:42:22] Jeff Nesbitt: keeps score? I'm reading it right

[: 00:42:23

[00:42:24] Okay. I love that. That's awesome. Yeah. It's a great book. It is a great book. I, um, I had to read it in doses. I found because like, it can be a lot right. To sit with. Um, it's exhausting. It is. It's, it's heavy. It's heavy for sure. Um, but it's, I think it's kind of goes in line with what you're talking about.

[: 00:42:39

[00:43:04] And I think that that's like very in line with like kind of the healing you did there, you know, you were able to release something in your body and bring it into your consciousness, into your brain to then, you know, process exactly. Process it. Yeah. That's the word. Yeah.

[: 00:43:19

[00:43:23] Alicia Trusty: complicated?

[: 00:43:23

[00:43:50] And so the ACO records are stored in the earth for a long time. I really felt like, oh, like, I didn't understand them. I thought that they were like, you know, like a, [00:44:00] an elusive thing, like the Amazon cloud. Right, exactly. Like the Amazon cloud, but it's actually like, they're, it's stored in the ground. Like rocks, mountains are like huge for.

[: 00:44:09

[00:44:33] I was in a really unhealthy relationship. Um, and I felt like I couldn't leave, like leaving felt like life or death. Like I felt like I had to stay there and make it work for at all costs. And I also felt like I was very, I'm very like drawn to the, OACO like to the place I'm from. Um, and I felt like I couldn't leave the land.

[: 00:44:54

[00:45:20] Um, and so we left, we couldn't hear God's voice. We wanted to get reconnected with God. So they sailed over to OACO, um, and settled in OACO amongst the native people. And, um, they. Took a vow and made a treaty, essentially with the native people that like, we will protect this land for you and for us, because we could hear God's voice speak, right.

[: 00:45:46

[00:46:09] It's not, it's not mine. I don't own it. So I actually like did a lot of meditating and a lot of releasing and like releasing my soul from this vow. And, um, so, so you went out of the vow. I went out of the vow. I went out the vow, you know, I feel like I didn't make the vow. You didn't make the vow. I didn't make the vow.

[: 00:46:25

[00:46:28] Jeff Nesbitt: job so far, but you don't have to do it forever.

[: 00:46:30

[00:46:43] I do things in places that I don't understand. And then like maybe later I'll have like dejavu and be like, oh, I don't have this. Do you have

[: 00:46:49

[00:46:57] Alicia Trusty: So Cape disappointment is [00:47:00] like, I'll just be sitting on the rocks and like, all this stuff will happen and I'm just like, good Lord. Get, you know, that's like part of the, I mean, it feels super safe to me. I love it. Mm-hmm but it's been one of those things for the longest time. I was like, why here? Um,

[: 00:47:14

[00:47:14] Alicia Trusty: made the vow, right?

[: 00:47:16

[00:47:19] Jeff Nesbitt: a spiritually like sacred area. Oh, for sure. Like also Chinook does. Oh, for sure. Like the park just down there, it feels like very good energy at that park. And like, when I'm looking up at the hillside at Fort Columbia, I, I am always just like struck by the beauty of that hillside.

[: 00:47:34

[00:47:39] Alicia Trusty: a great spot for sure. This land is, is beautiful. It's like, honestly, where we live is such a beautiful place.

[: 00:47:45

[00:47:51] I,

[: 00:47:51

[00:48:12] I really feel that they're real though. Recently, this is kind of crazy, but I had been having these dreams about me in this Mount, like in a valley, like I was in a valley, in a mountain, there's all this water. Um, and I could like see the place so specifically. And I was like, gosh, like, this feels real, but I have no idea where it is.

[: 00:48:32

[00:48:53] Right. And, um, when I went on the website, it was the weirdest thing, the pictures of where they [00:49:00] live is the place I've been dreaming about. No

[: 00:49:02

[00:49:05] Alicia Trusty: that. Yeah, no, yeah. I'm going I'm I'm in. So

[: 00:49:09

[00:49:24] Like, uh, if you just talked about some random, like. I don't know, like some candy bar that you loved when you were a kid, but it's been off the market for 20 years. And then 30 seconds after you talk about it, person on the TV show, you're watching mentions it or something makes a joke about it. That kind of shit happens to me constantly.

[: 00:49:42

[00:50:03] Sure. Continue on. Continue on. And I just keep, I see more, the more I notice it, the more often I see them, I see them every day. Oh, for sure. Like they haven't

[: 00:50:12

[00:50:22] Right. The red pill, it is the red pill. I've never seen the matrix. What I know,

[: 00:50:26

[00:50:44] Like okay. Um, maybe not even that long, but everyone was obsessed with it for the graphics, because it had like 3d shots and frozen shots. Like there was some iconic. Cinematography in that film. And, uh, it's [00:51:00] a, it's a beautifully made film, but years and years would go by where, I mean, like, it was my favorite movie for years and I had no idea what it was about.

[: 00:51:09

[00:51:34] Some people are, are able to wake up and see that. Yeah. And that's, that's basically the whole movie in a nutshell. That's sounds like

[: 00:51:40

[00:51:44] Jeff Nesbitt: Like I haven't seen the new one though. There's a fourth one. Now that just came out. I see.

[: 00:51:48

[00:51:51] Jeff Nesbitt: It's fine. The sec, the sequels I saw, I like, I built them up too much cuz they came out when I was like a senior in high school probably. And it was disappointing, [00:52:00] but um, yeah. Yeah. They're still great movies, but I was like, I was so obsessed with the first one for years getting up to I was, I built 'em up too much and I was like, oh, they're a little disappointing.

[: 00:52:09

[00:52:22] Alicia Trusty: That's hilarious. I love that. That's great. Um, you know, like one of my favorite sayings is like seeing the forest through the trees.

[: 00:52:32

[00:52:38] Jeff Nesbitt: it is. Yeah. I love looking at the world. Not just the world, but pretty much all of existence. You can zoom way out. You can zoom way in and things look pretty much the same.

[: 00:52:48

[00:53:05] Oh yeah.

[: 00:53:06

[00:53:07] Jeff Nesbitt: earth. Yeah. Yeah. We're all made of the same stuff. We're all one thing. Mm-hmm, one big thing that can also though, that can also be kind of a daunting thought because it makes people feel insignificant for

[: 00:53:20

[00:53:27] You know, we all have like lessons to learn. We all have a reason that we're here to like, to grow and expand. Right. That's why we're here. Yet. Part of that expansion I think, is really accepting like the vastness of the world and the universe. And like, like outer space is like the most fascinating thing, because it's just like, if you think about everything in the world and you standing like you and I sitting right here and the entire world, like, [00:54:00] yeah, it's a, it can be like a little overwhelming maybe is the word like, it's like, oh, damn we are a little insignificant.

[: 00:54:07

[00:54:11] Jeff Nesbitt: Exactly. Like, I feel so comforted by that thought. Yeah. It's like, oh, well what I do, isn't that big of a deal then, right? Yeah. Yeah, sure. I think that's a good, a really good. Awareness to, to have to hold because people take their lives so seriously.

[: 00:54:25

[00:54:33] Alicia Trusty: Yeah. It's heavy enough, you know? Yeah. Like there's gonna be things that happen that make life heavy. And, you know, we all have to, like, in the modern world, we have gotta have jobs. We've gotta like pay bills.

[: 00:54:43

[00:55:02] Um, but it's like, when you can like laugh at yourself and like, actually be like, oh, like, I can't believe that I thought that that was true. Or I can't believe, like, that's hilarious that I, that I, uh, you know, was so hard on myself about something that I ended up right. Like getting or doing. And I didn't even, like for me, it was like going to Los Angeles and being an actor.

[: 00:55:22

[00:55:36] Jeff Nesbitt: youngest kid. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's not a, that's not a strange impulse to want to be a performer and want to get that attention.

[: 00:55:43

[00:55:45] Alicia Trusty: sure. Right. Like, I mean, Yes. My poor sisters. Well,

[: 00:55:49

[00:56:03] If you're gonna be getting one in, on these kids or five years older than you or whatever. Yeah, for

[: 00:56:07

[00:56:22] And then to like, be in it and doing it, I was like, wow, I don't want this. But I felt like I couldn't quit. I felt like I couldn't walk away because like I said, I wanted it. Yeah.

[: 00:56:31

[00:56:40] If, if you quit, that's a failure. If you would've from the very beginning, been like, I'm gonna go try this thing and envision it going either direction. Right. Don't hope too much for any one outcome. It becomes a lot easier to not view quitting as a failure, for sure.

[: 00:56:56

[00:57:02] Nobody's making me do this and I don't have to do something. That's not lighting me up. I really think we should follow what lights us up, you

[: 00:57:09

[00:57:17] Alicia Trusty: Yeah, I think, you know, it starts with like, think about like, what's the most like wild thing. Like if you could do anything with your life, right. Like, think about that. Like, if you could be anywhere in the world, money's not an issue. Like whatever your responsibilities are, aren't an issue. You could do whatever you want.

[: 00:57:35

[00:57:57] Let go of the stress of like, [00:58:00] what will happen if I'm gone for like extended months at a time. Um, you know, I started to like really dream and just like envision, even if it's like, oh, like what would light me up is like walking on the beach every day for an hour. Like envision how you can actually do that and then start to try it, start to do it.

[: 00:58:19

[00:58:29] Jeff Nesbitt: was just gonna say that that's where I would go with it is, is just scale back, start at the beginning. Think of your body as like. animal that you need to take care of. Like, what does the, what does the animal need?

[: 00:58:41

[00:58:58] So when I'm feeling like [00:59:00] shit or I'm feeling like nothing is sparking up that inspiration feeling, I'll just start with the, the human animal. It's like, do I have the right kind of food in my body? Not really have I slept? Well, no, mm-hmm , you know, am I getting enough fresh air? No, like, no wonder. I don't feel inspired because I've got myself in a fucking box.

[: 00:59:16

[00:59:29] Alicia Trusty: Exactly. No, exactly. It is that. And, and kind of seeing, like exploring where in your body, these things show up, like where do you feel?

[: 00:59:39

[00:59:57] Jeff Nesbitt: it's the same physical sensation.

[: 00:59:58

[01:00:18] And these are all straight men walking across the thing. And at the end of the survey, she hands her card and says, if you have any questions about this survey, or if you're feeling upset, like, you know, the standard psychological debriefing. Yeah. Following a participation in a research project, she gives them their card.

[: 01:00:35

[01:00:54] I don't remember exactly what the conditions were, but what they found was that people have a really hard time distinguishing between [01:01:00] sexual attraction, like arousal from sexual attraction and arousal from fear. Yeah. Because of going over this bridge, they were aroused already and they thought the person at the end was more attractive than they would have otherwise thought.

[: 01:01:12

[01:01:23] Alicia Trusty: is crazy. It, and it, you know, like, have you read Brene Brown's new book? No. So the Atlas of the heart, she talks about feelings and like she did a survey across all of her social media platforms and they had like 70,000 or like more results that they had to like sort through.

[: 01:01:39

[01:02:02] And they, when we don't have the language to describe like certain sensations, it actually limits the human experience. And it's like a fascinating book. And also she has like an HBO, um, like series on it. She turned it into a series because she just likes to make like stuff accessible for everybody. You know?

[: 01:02:19

[01:02:22] Jeff Nesbitt: That kind of reminds me of like the, if we don't have a word for something, the actual concept is harder to bring up in your mind. Um, some cultures don't have a word for a separate word for pink. They just call it light red. And so in those cultures, it's. A separate color and, but to an American pink and red are two different colors.

[: 01:02:43

[01:02:48] Alicia Trusty: fascinating.

[: 01:02:49

[01:03:08] I don't know. They have an additional cell that can read another color from the, you know, electromagnetic spectrum that most women and all men cannot see. That's amazing. Yeah. That's the, they can actually see another color. Yeah. That's, that's a whole, that's an additional component to reality for

[: 01:03:26

[01:03:26] And that shows us, right. Like our perception is not always matter of fact, right. It's not always like the end all say I'll be all of everything.

[: 01:03:37

[01:03:49] Yeah, for sure. Which is a hard thing to accept. But once you do, it makes the world way easier. Yeah. Like, are you into quantum

[: 01:03:58

[01:04:11] And I, I love like learning new things, but I, myself could not be a quantum physicist.

[: 01:04:17

[01:04:20] Alicia Trusty: is. I know. Right. But it's so fascinating

[: 01:04:22

[01:04:33] And I, I had a really powerful visual in my mind that made sense of it for me. So like step away for a second, from your experience as a human, with a narrative, with a linear time perception, all of that goes away and just picture open whiteness, just a white space, just like on the matrix. Okay. Yes. When they load in all the guns, um, you're in this white space, [01:05:00] it has no time, no dimension, no direction.

[: 01:05:03

[01:05:24] Elements. There's a certain number of, of molecules atoms and all that stuff. You could, you could put it into a quantum computer and you could, you could represent that if you had enough computing power. So if you can represent the, all of potential in this, think of it like a cloud, right? It looks like a cloud.

[: 01:05:41

[01:06:01] And that's enough with the magnetism of consciousness, through human thought and perception to pull some of that quantum material from the field and materialize it into three dimensions, like bring it into a tight enough density. Yeah. To experience it from a, a perceptive place. And from there, then time is going to be evolved no matter what, because of the way we experience reality.

[: 01:06:23

[01:06:49] It just carved through that. But in three dimensions, mm-hmm um, because in this representation, uh, if you put billions and billions of those, just those drops of consciousness [01:07:00] into the field, all at the same time, they're gonna intersect, they're going to, you know, influence each other. Yeah. And they're gonna overlap when two of 'em are on the same line, they're gonna experience a very similar version of reality.

[: 01:07:12

[01:07:29] And it, and it fits. And yeah, because let's say you're, you're on one of these strands. That's like, like an ant carving a tunnel through dirt. You're on one of these strands, the, the quantum material that's just outside of your strand is things that are, that are the parallel universes that are the most like yours.

[: 01:07:51

[01:08:21] And we are materializing them into physical reality. Yeah. Over and over and over and over again all day long every day. That's what we do as humans. 100%. Yeah. It's I find that fascinating.

[: 01:08:31

[01:08:42] Yeah. Like we have potential potential. We don't even understand. And we're limited to that potential by the thoughts and the, the way that we perceive our reality. But if we can like expand beyond that and really open our consciousness and

[: 01:08:58

[01:09:02] Alicia Trusty: for sure.

[: 01:09:02

[01:09:07] Jeff Nesbitt: so I know the answer by the way. Oh, it's hard to control people. Yeah. That's what I was just gonna say when they're all doing their own thing and they're all thinking independent thoughts and they're all trying to find answers. That's a hard group to

[: 01:09:17

[01:09:18] Oh, for sure. And it's like power loves fear, you know? Um, and our. Powers that be, they're not like power. Okay. This is a thing that I love. And Brene brown said it power when it's shared and it's used how it's supposed to be used. It grows, it's expansive, just like possibilities, right? When, when we can share power as a society and grow together and expand as a group in that way, like everyone think of the possibilities that exist.

[: 01:09:49

[01:10:13] You, you know, you make it so that they can't think about these things because they're in survival mode. They think they need you. Yeah. They depend on you. And they think that you, um, you know, without you, like what will happen, they're afraid. And yeah. It's exactly that it's control. It all comes back down to control.

[: 01:10:29

[01:10:46] Yeah. Thank, thank God because oh yeah. The thing is too, that's funny. The government quote, unquote, the government is not an entity that makes like, that doesn't have thoughts. The government is, is a nameless, faceless [01:11:00] entity made up of individual humans who have emotions and do have thoughts and stuff.

[: 01:11:04

[01:11:11] Alicia Trusty: no, they don't. They don't at all. Exactly. And it is like, it's crazy to me that we like put Tru like blindly, like blind trust, blind faith. I mean, that's a thing that's kind of encouraged in.

[: 01:11:23

[01:11:34] Jeff Nesbitt: it does. Does, yeah. The cults of consumerism.

[: 01:11:37

[01:11:51] Jeff Nesbitt: like we're in these like pods of pink goo with tubes coming out of us and we're just batteries.

[: 01:11:56

[01:11:57] Alicia Trusty: contribute that's from the matrix. My God, I gotta watch the gotta [01:12:00] watch the, this is a full circle moment. No, exactly. I do. I need to watch it because it is exactly. That's how it

[: 01:12:04

[01:12:06] Alicia Trusty: movie. Okay. I'm gonna watch it. I'm gonna watch it

[: 01:12:08

[01:12:09] It might not hold up. Honestly. It's been a while since I watched it, it was 99, but it was state of the art state of the art.

[: 01:12:15

[01:12:21] Jeff Nesbitt: No, no, yes. It was. Nope. Nope. Couldn't

[: 01:12:23

[01:12:31] Jeff Nesbitt: That, that makes sense. So, so I was like in 94 you were in 94. You were

[: 01:12:36

[01:12:42] Jeff Nesbitt: My guess is 98 or 97. Let's look it up. Let's

[: 01:12:45

[01:12:47] Jeff Nesbitt: know. Hey Siri, when was Titanic?

[: 01:12:54

[01:13:08] I'm gonna start over. That's okay.

[: 01:13:14

[01:13:22] Alicia Trusty: Here's an answer from Wikipedia. Titanic is a 1997 American epic romance and disaster film directed, written, produced. And co-edited by James Cameron. Okay. So yeah, you were right. That makes sense though. That makes sense. That's the

[: 01:13:36

[01:13:38] Alicia Trusty: I know I was like, definitely obsessed with it, for the sex.

[: 01:13:41

[01:14:00] Yeah. Like why'd you guys let me, like, first of all, Like forbidden love seemed just like so attractive Romeo and

[: 01:14:06

[01:14:07] Alicia Trusty: Yeah. Like, yeah. And then like sacrifice and like all these things, Romeo and

[: 01:14:11

[01:14:19] Yeah. It's gross.

[: 01:14:20

[01:14:24] Jeff Nesbitt: a classic. It is. Hey, I love Shakespeare different time. Shakespeare is good. It it's kind of timeless. It is. It is. I'm always shocked when I find it. Good too. Cuz it, I don't, I don't know why. I would just assume that it's something I don't kinda like Jane Austin.

[: 01:14:38

[01:14:45] Alicia Trusty: flows. It does, it has like a nice rhythm to it. You know, it's written like that. Um, what is it?

[: 01:14:49

[01:14:52] Alicia Trusty: That's what it

[: 01:14:53

[01:15:04] Alicia Trusty: since still to this day.

[: 01:15:05

[01:15:17] Jeff Nesbitt: If you've never seen it. There is probably so many films that people are unaware are based on Shakespearean plays. Oh, for

[: 01:15:23

[01:15:29] Jeff Nesbitt: writing. Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, cool guy. Yeah. I think, I assume.

[: 01:15:36

[01:15:47] Jeff Nesbitt: Oh man. Yeah. You must have been in there with some annoying people. Oh

[: 01:15:51

[01:15:52] Jeff Nesbitt: And like, and no offense, actors are great.

[: 01:15:54

[01:15:57] Alicia Trusty: like the, the theater, like the musical theater [01:16:00] kids.

[: 01:16:00

[01:16:03] Alicia Trusty: but I love 'em too. They're an acquired taste. I can't judge cuz like literally in one of them, but I was always that one and like that I started smoking a lot of weed in college and they were always like, she's just too cool for school kind of energy.

[: 01:16:16

[01:16:34] Jeff Nesbitt: know, what's kind of funny is that when you're acting you and you feel this, that when you bump up against that dissonance where you're like, this is pretending I'm, I'm pretending, it almost feels dishonest in a way.

[: 01:16:46

[01:17:09] And everything they, they do is, is a character they're playing that they have established as their identity, but it's really just another character for sure. And you, you have to make sure everything you're doing is aligning with the character. And the, I hate that shit. I stopped doing that and it, my life got much easier, but people think I'm way weirder because I'm less

[: 01:17:26

[01:17:27] Oh, same. I'm so not cons. That's like something that I struggle with really hard. I am the most inconsistent person on the face. I mean, not like, obviously that's dramatic, but I am really inconsistent. I'm like not a great friend. Um, I'm available a lot less to people that like, you know, like maintaining like childhood relationships or, um, , um, even like, I'm a, I'm like I hate dating.

[: 01:17:52

[01:18:14] I was like, God, I'm like a bad person, but it's like, no, I'm not a bad person. Like if I, if my body is like, I don't wanna go do that thing or like, go be social or like maintain a relationship with someone that like, I haven't talked to in 10, 15 years, it's like, that's okay. You know? Yeah.

[: 01:18:31

[01:18:38] I don't want to do it. I have no interest in doing that. Or if it's just like, I'm just afraid that it might be awkward that, but I really do wanna go like, yeah, those, those are two very different things, even though they feel very similar, but like, you gotta be able to tell the difference cuz if you just hide from everything, you're not gonna feel good.

[: 01:18:54

[01:19:00] Alicia Trusty: Life is a balancing act for sure.

[: 01:19:02

[01:19:14] It doesn't, I, I just, my mind, can't, can't really wrap. I can't wrap my head around how it could happen. Like I do not believe that the people who've made that decision truly think that all of half, more than half the country believes that this is the way it should be. I just, I can't. Is it because I'm in an echo chamber or is there some fuckery going on?

[: 01:19:34

[01:19:35] Alicia Trusty: Uh, yeah. You know, it's a, I think it might be both, right? Yeah. I think it might be both because here's the thing that like, has been, that scares me a little bit. It's not even scares me. It's just like, I can't really conceptualize it because it's like so far out of like my thought field that like men are afraid of like women.

[: 01:19:56

[01:19:57] Jeff Nesbitt: always been true. Right,

[: 01:19:59

[01:20:00] Jeff Nesbitt: They have all, they have all

[: 01:20:01

[01:20:11] Jeff Nesbitt: see, I don't think that's what it is. I think that's a false narrative. That's just so easy because people who are mad can, can say that.

[: 01:20:20

[01:20:35] Oh, for

[: 01:20:35

[01:20:58] Me too. And, um, [01:21:00] I'll I'll drive. 'em exactly like, so I really think that, you know, what has been like the goal for the last, let's say eight years division division, 100% division. And if we're divided, we can't really come together to work on these very real issues and say like, wait a second, like you, I don't how many people are in the Supreme court?

[: 01:21:23

[01:21:25] Jeff Nesbitt: Right. Eight or nine, eight, I think it's eight.

[: 01:21:27

[01:21:45] Jeff Nesbitt: they don't know which direction it's gonna.

[: 01:21:47

[01:22:13] So, oh, for sure. I think you're right. I think that's exactly what it is. I think that the timing of, of them doing this Roe V Wade reversal was, was very strategic because of where we are in the election cycle. I think that it's all just part of a, a much larger plan. And I don't know what that plan

[: 01:22:30

[01:22:31] So have you read about the food, food shortages? Yeah. So it's like, seems like a pretty good distraction from like real fucking issues. Like yeah. Like the fact that like the world globally water, the whole clean drinking water situation, that's so scary. That's terrifying.

[: 01:22:48

[01:22:49] Like, we'll be some of the last people to still have

[: 01:22:52

[01:23:10] Yeah. And I think that like, yeah, I don't know what it is. I'm a little nervous to find out

[: 01:23:15

[01:23:33] Yeah. Because of the fact that how important it is to keep some moisture in here before we burn all of our forests down, like there is, it's really easy for me to play that out in my mind and be like, oh yeah, that technology exists. There are people who have the ability to do it without it causing a big ruckus.

[: 01:23:51

[01:23:53] Alicia Trusty: they would. I mean like why wouldn't they? Yeah. They do a lot of other shit that like, that, that [01:24:00] we don't know about. And we just kind of like go about our lives. People get

[: 01:24:04

[01:24:17] Oh yeah. Like just because that's what stimulates my brain. Yeah. Like to, to hear like what crazy shit are people believing these days? And then. That, that is one that I have over, like the last 10 years probably I have paid attention. I have watched the skies that I've gone in and out of being like, it's possible.

[: 01:24:35

[01:24:38] Alicia Trusty: at this point, I would say like, why not? You know? Yeah. Like, Hey, we just talked about how there are infinite possibilities. It's

[: 01:24:44

[01:24:47] Alicia Trusty: yeah, the one I can't get behind is the like birds being, oh, birds being robots.

[: 01:24:53

[01:24:55] Jeff Nesbitt: you ever watched them? I'm around the birds all the time. They're real. 100%.

[: 01:24:57

[01:25:05] Jeff Nesbitt: think that's more of an urban conspiracy, right?

[: 01:25:07

[01:25:27] And I was like, this, this really happened. Yeah. And that bird was not a robot. No,

[: 01:25:32

[01:25:48] I was at rock bottom in my life. I was going, I actually had just had an abortion and I was like going through some really hard things. And, um, I was leaving like my toxic abusive [01:26:00] relationship. And so I like really came to like surrendering to the universe and surrendering to everything that is, and just that a good place.

[: 01:26:07

[01:26:20] Jeff Nesbitt: so true.

[: 01:26:21

[01:26:32] And like this Eagle came and I was like, wow, this is so strange. Like, I didn't think much of it. And then a few days later I was like losing my mind and I was like, I gotta go. And I, so I went to the cemetery to see my grandpa great guy. And, uh, I was just like crying to him and like asking him to just like really, you know, give me guidance and to like really like, send love to [01:27:00] my, I, I agree.

[: 01:27:01

[01:27:22] And I was like, okay, I'm here. I surrender. Yeah. So now I just like, will be like, thinking something that gave me goosebumps I'm serious. Like I'll just be having things and like having thoughts or like going through something. And then an Eagle will just like, come to me and I'm like,

[: 01:27:36

[01:27:43] Yeah. At this point?

[: 01:27:43

[01:27:44] Jeff Nesbitt: sure. Like, I, uh, hesitate to use the term, but like a spirit animal.

[: 01:27:48

[01:27:51] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah. It's been very much hijacked by, uh, white people. I

[: 01:27:56

[01:28:01] Yeah. Figure out a way to sell it. And we like twist it a little bit, like yeah. To make it a little like out of context

[: 01:28:08

[01:28:22] Oh, for sure. And it's, it's hard to do that, um, in this world respectfully. Yes. Because you look like such a tool like, so shamanism is a great example. Yes. There are some very Caucasian shamans and it's probably a bit of an uphill battle. Oh, for sure. Just like, just to

[: 01:28:39

[01:28:52] And like, sacredly like going and doing this work, um, they're ruining it for us. Yeah. And that sucks.

[: 01:28:59

[01:29:04] Alicia Trusty: And so that's where, like I would say it is a little bit of an uphill battle because then when you're like, actually someone who's doing the work and working really hard for it, or, or like coming from a place of a genuine, authentic place of like, I'm called to this, or, or I've been sent here by something greater than myself, then people automatically assume like, I, I, this is my biggest fear is like, I'm a white woman.

[: 01:29:28

[01:29:57] Yeah. Beliefs and [01:30:00] practices, even though I think that those cultures are way more in tune with the reality of what this all is about than white people have been for a

[: 01:30:08

[01:30:18] Yeah. As like, I love. So many people who are Christians, uh, same and

[: 01:30:23

[01:30:26] Jeff Nesbitt: Catholic. Yeah. There's a lot of good there, but yeah, there has been a lot of watering down of the truth and insertion of things that are not true as a way to control people. And it, anything that is based in constructed to figure out a way to control large groups of people.

[: 01:30:42

[01:30:48] Alicia Trusty: I don't know. Yeah. You know, I, some the other day I was listening to something and she said somebody they were talking about like, what do you think of when you hear about organized religion? Or like, when you think about like reverence, I think was the [01:31:00] word judgment.

[: 01:31:00

[01:31:17] Jeff Nesbitt: God as a source of all energy, not God as a system of rules.

[: 01:31:20

[01:31:21] Alicia Trusty: Right. And she's like, and we put human hands in it. And now that we've put human hands in it it's inevitably going to be yeah.

[: 01:31:27

[01:31:35] Alicia Trusty: Yeah, he did.

[: 01:31:37

[01:31:39] Jeff Nesbitt: of the chocolate. I know that chocolate looked like shit. I'll be honest though. We're talking pretty watery. Yes. Very watery. Pretty watery, very watery. Yeah, I still would've taken a taste though, you know? Oh, I mean, I get it like that, that scene of that movie is like my childhood happy place in a nutshell, that candy room.

[: 01:31:56

[01:32:14] And then every once in a while he'll blow up and be like enrage. Like when he yells at Charlie for stealing the fizzy lifting drink. Yes. Um, love it. I love that scene. I love that whole movie.

[: 01:32:24

[01:32:31] Yeah. Perfect

[: 01:32:32

[01:32:49] Alicia Trusty: Yeah. You know, his wife died when he was pretty young, I think. Yeah. When they were young, um, And, you know, that's like something I've found, unfortunately about a lot of really talented [01:33:00] actors and, and, and artists, there's a deep sadness and yeah. And it, you know, getting, having the ability to express it and like use it right.

[: 01:33:10

[01:33:11] Jeff Nesbitt: gift, but that's what makes good art is the ability to convey those hard emotions and actually connect with people who are feeling them in real time. Like, yeah. Have you ever written music try to write poetry, music, any kind of emotional stuff? Yeah. It like when you sit down and do it, if you're not actively in that mind state, it feels very inauthentic.

[: 01:33:30

[01:33:47] Yeah. And I don't know that it's something you can even really fake.

[: 01:33:50

[01:34:06] Right. Like, cuz you wanna go there, you wanna create something good and you wanna be, you know, art matters, but coming back from there. Yeah. And some people really struggle with that coming back, you know, it's boring here. It is pretty boring

[: 01:34:21

[01:34:27] Oh gosh. It's it's, uh, it's

[: 01:34:30

[01:34:49] Jeff Nesbitt: know, I'm pretty sure.

[: 01:34:51

[01:35:09] Like the universe had to, like, if you think about that example we used earlier where there's that field of possibility, let's say that existed somewhere in existence and whatever kind of, you know, intelligent force or maybe non intelligent. I don't know. Maybe it's like an automaton, like a very simple, very simple structure that can create intricate and complex forms.

[: 01:35:33

[01:35:50] And all we are is just a whole bunch of those drops. And just trying to let the universe experience itself in as many different ways as possible. For sure. Good and bad. I love [01:36:00] that.

[: 01:36:00

[01:36:18] Yeah, I

[: 01:36:19

[01:36:49] Okay. Like, because we are all collectively using our consciousness to pull those possibilities into reality. Every other potential reality still only [01:37:00] exists in the world of potential. So I, I think that every possibility. Ever is, is in existence right now, which means that yes, there's an infinite number of universes or realities where you and me are sitting in the same room with different hair or, you know, different tablecloth everything, infinite, billions upon billions of different combinations of molecules.

[: 01:37:21

[01:37:43] And I'm not a determinist in the sense that I don't think that all those decisions are laid out ahead of you. Yeah. I think that in the grand scheme of things, if there is a greater intelligence that can conceptualize all that at once, that intelligence probably knows what decision you're gonna make before you make it, because [01:38:00] it doesn't view time in a linear sense like we do.

[: 01:38:02

[01:38:31] Infertile, like, I've talked about this on the podcast a few times, but the, I did this meditation where I, it, it was from this guy named Dr. Joe Dispenza. Mm-hmm mm-hmm I know him. He's getting some traction these days. Yeah. He's people are starting to like, not think of him as a quack, which is

[: 01:38:50

[01:38:53] Jeff Nesbitt: but a lot of people aren't and they're like, oh, this guy's crazy.

[: 01:38:56

[01:39:15] Yeah. Which is supposedly not possible. Right. It's it's amazing shit. But it is. I read all Joe SP's books and absolutely just loved them. It, it just makes so much sense to me, the stuff he says, is it just like, it just rings truth. Mm-hmm even though I have, I'm not trained as a quantum physicist, so I can't really fact check him, but a lot of the stuff he says just feels real.

[: 01:39:38

[01:39:50] Alicia Trusty: can feel truth. Yeah. On a cellular level, our brains. This is something that I focus on in like in the work I'm doing right now.

[: 01:39:57

[01:40:14] Like exactly what I'm talking about. Proof,

[: 01:40:16

[01:40:31] Yeah. It's just, we can feel it. It's very visceral. It's real. It is. It is. I love that. So I, uh, he, I read one of his books. I don't remember which one it was is either you are the placebo or becoming supernatural mm-hmm . And the, it talks a lot about these spontaneous healing events where he'd hold these big, uh, festivals basically where all these people who support him would come.

[: 01:40:51

[01:41:13] And. Your reality. Yeah. And you can do that by bringing in the thoughts and feelings of your desired reality. It's like he, he just kind of figured out this system for how to get around your own self defeating, like roadblocks. It, it, it just taught me how to get outta my own way. That's awesome. Following his meditation, I was sitting in the forest under this gigantic Cedar tree mm-hmm , which I has always been like one of my it's my spirit plant.

[: 01:41:40

[01:42:11] Now focus the, the attention on just outside of the space between your eyes, like in the, like the space to where you're bringing your awareness, not only to your body, but to the space that surrounds your body, which essentially. just like makes you become part of your space around your body, for sure. You cease to be separate.

[: 01:42:29

[01:42:45] I pictured this little girl who now lives in my home mm-hmm but, and I just thanked God for letting me have her. And E even if it was just in this moment in the meditation, I just thanked God for the [01:43:00] experience of like this love that I was feeling mm-hmm and it was very real mm-hmm and I felt like in order to even do this, I had to let go of all of these ideas that I believed about myself, about being in fertile about being afraid of being a bad dad about the, like, what if being afraid of the possibility that I might never have a child and how much that is gonna hurt, because I've wanted it so bad my whole life.

[: 01:43:23

[01:43:41] And then I had to realize. Who gives a fuck. Yeah. Even if it never happens, you get to have this little shred of it in this moment where you're, you're trying to bring up those feelings and thoughts of like, what it would feel like to be in this experience. And I did this like two or three times, and these meditations are an hour [01:44:00] apiece.

[: 01:44:00

[01:44:24] And it was a very powerful, very powerful experience. Didn't think much of it after that went on with my life. I do weird shit like that all the time. I'm always stopping in the woods to have a quick, have a quick thought under the shade of a Cedar tree. Yes. It's not that weird. No, I get it. And then I went on with my life and two or three weeks later, um, I get a text message that it was a picture of a pregnancy test and my wife was pregnant.

[: 01:44:46

[01:45:12] And I made her out out of just like the raw materials of the universe and with the help of one. Very, very helpful uterus. Yes. I mean, young woman named Melissa. I can't take a lot of credit. I didn't, I didn't do a lot of the physical work, but,

[: 01:45:26

[01:45:27] Jeff Nesbitt: like the, you know, the fact that she exists now is still mind blowing to me.

[: 01:45:31

[01:45:52] Like, they are, you know, this is, it's easy to be self critical, right? Like all those things you were talking about, [01:46:00] it's easy to be like, you know, am I gonna be a good dad? Am I gonna, I do that shit all the time. I'm like, you know, can I really help people? Like I doubt myself. Sometimes it's like, the passion is there.

[: 01:46:11

[01:46:44] Jeff Nesbitt: place.

[: 01:46:45

[01:47:07] I don't believe that at all. I think that there there's, it's just so much more complicated than that, but, uh, for sure. Yeah. I don't have to go into the myriad of reasons why I don't think that that's the truth, but the point is I, I was just never open to alternative forms of belief. Yeah. And, and ways of, you know, feeling like I was connected to God, because it says very clearly in the tradition that I was brought up in that if I try that I will be burned forever.

[: 01:47:35

[01:47:40] Alicia Trusty: a lie. I think it was too. I mean, I, I, I relate to that, like a little, you know, I, my family's not religious, but I was super religious. Um, like through childhood friend influence and stuff like that. Like also you

[: 01:47:51

[01:47:53] Oh, for sure. It, it underlies our whole culture. Yeah.

[: 01:47:56

[01:48:10] And at six or seven, I like wholeheartedly was like, whoa, I'm going to hell. Like, I like just was like, fuck. I like, I can't I'm, that's just not in the cards room after, you know, watching the Titanic all those years at seven, I was like, I'm no, I'd be fucking like, yeah, this is not an option. That

[: 01:48:25

[01:48:27] Everybody's doing it. Right. He's not gonna put just me

[: 01:48:30

[01:48:52] God did not do anything about it. Um, that was up to the people in the situation and they later did stuff about it. But, um, [01:49:00] I went through this period. Around like 19, I just like really became a really hardcore atheist. I was like, science is all that, that there is we are gonna die and that's gonna be it.

[: 01:49:17

[01:49:39] I was very lost. My compass did not know where to point. And so like, that was like another time in my life where I was fully like hit a wall, hit a wall and was like, well, fuck, like maybe there is something else. And that's when I started to find spirituality and like in this way, um, and that wasn't until I was like [01:50:00] 22.

[: 01:50:01

[01:50:26] Jeff Nesbitt: powerful.

[: 01:50:26

[01:50:46] And like you need those days of just quiet existence. Yeah. Peace. Yeah. And it's yeah. Those days are depressing if you don't think there's anything else for sure. For sure. Yeah. Do you deal with depression? [01:51:00]

[: 01:51:00

[01:51:10] Right. And, um, the biggest thing for me. So have you ever heard of human design? No. Super cool concept. And it actually involves quantum physics. So, um, it's this idea. It takes quantum physics and astrology and. Um, it lays them over the top of each other. And so it kind of creates this chart, cuz we all entered this human plane on a specific day, on a specific time with specific coordinates.

[: 01:51:38

[01:51:58] Jeff Nesbitt: is that similar to like a soul contract?

[: 01:51:59

[01:52:04] Alicia Trusty: that is more in line with your AIC, um, records, but no, so like you're, you're, you're like, um, so for like how I can best describe it is like my, I have, we all have channels chakras in our bodies, right? Like we have these channels and you know, someone who's born in the middle of July might not have the same channels open as someone who's born in November.

[: 01:52:29

[01:52:53] Like they're always the action takers, um, and like facilitators, if [01:53:00] you will, of ideas, sometimes it takes a partnership to like bring it to fruition. But that's what I was just gonna

[: 01:53:04

[01:53:16] Yeah. That, that cause these giant social transformations, for sure. But this is more of a spiritual

[: 01:53:22

[01:53:40] And so that means that like sometimes other people's thoughts and feelings and, um, ideas, I will like take them on and own them as my own. And, um, that has like, knowing that about myself, I've been able to like actually really tune into what's mine and what's not mine. And I've gotten. [01:54:00] Like more in control of my depression and like how, how I, my anxiety and kind of like my emotional state through these things and like understanding how I operate in the world.

[: 01:54:09

[01:54:28] You need to like shave your head and not talk to anybody, you know, ego, ego, ego ego, 100%. And so I know when I'm in that place, never take action. Yeah. Like I just am like, okay, you're on a, you're on a low, we're gonna let this ride itself out. And we're gonna like ground ourselves.

[: 01:54:44

[01:54:45] Like to, to have that knowledge about yourself, to know yourself well enough to know like, yes, I'm here now, but this is temporary. Yes. And temporal it's outside of me. I can't control it. I it's gonna be over soon. I'm just gonna continue to stay on the path. [01:55:00] Yes.

[: 01:55:00

[01:55:05] Um, because. You know, we, things feel permanent. Our ego wants things to feel like, wants us to believe things are permanent

[: 01:55:15

[01:55:21] Alicia Trusty: like it's cha I've changed so fucking much in my it's like, sometimes that's why I also like, feel a little disconnected from maybe friends I've had in the past or ideas.

[: 01:55:32

[01:55:45] Jeff Nesbitt: is it though? No takes a year or something for all of your cells to recycle. That's

[: 01:55:49

[01:55:53] Yeah.

[: 01:55:53

[01:56:04] Alicia Trusty: No. And if your brain, if your brain is staying the same, if you're not growing that consciousness and changing with your cells and your body, like, I feel like that is where people can get caught in these cycles of ego of, you know, like.

[: 01:56:18

[01:56:39] Like there you go. You have to get uncomfortable. If you are comfortable believing that I'm unworthy. I don't matter. Um, my life is obsolete. This is what it is. And you're not, oh, you're not, you know, I it's like you have to be just as uncomfortable staying the same as you are as about [01:57:00] like being uncomfortable is changing.

[: 01:57:01

[01:57:03] Jeff Nesbitt: makes perfect sense. Yeah. Like you have to let yourself be uncomfortable. Yeah. You can't just seek comfort at every opportunity cuz that that is stagnation. Yeah. And there's, there's no to go from there.

[: 01:57:13

[01:57:16] Jeff Nesbitt: Yeah. And we all kind of can feel that too.

[: 01:57:18

[01:57:29] Alicia Trusty: No, exactly. It's not. It really isn't. And I think that's, uh, one of my favorite things about it is like, we just dared just show up, get in the arena as Brene brown would say, get in the arena, get uncomfortable, just fucking show up.

[: 01:57:46

[01:57:52] Jeff Nesbitt: it up. Yeah. And the process is messy, but it's worth

[: 01:57:56

[01:58:08] Like that's such a ego based word. Um, but like fail at like healing at, at expanding, at learning than I would to say in the exact same place and never question my reality and never expand beyond that.

[: 01:58:22

[01:58:30] Um, just I have forgotten. Yeah. Um, sound, sound, and vibration. So yes. You mentioned sound healing somewhere in there. And, um, I, I think that there is a lot of potential for technology that involves sound and healing and all that kind of thing with resonant frequencies and all that kind of stuff. What, what do, what do you know about sound healing?

[: 01:58:49

[01:59:20] Jeff Nesbitt: Oh, I've got a great fact

[: 01:59:21

[01:59:35] Jeff Nesbitt: Oh my God. That's awesome. So get this, I just learned, so you, I'm sure you've heard your whole life that a B structurally shouldn't be able to fly because their wings are too small.

[: 01:59:45

[02:00:06] That's crazy. And they're able, that's why they can make like crazy turns and hover and do all this stuff that most flying. Bugs and an insects and animals can't do cuz they're levitating. Yeah. Like have you seen those beetles wings that levitate? Yeah. Like it's crazy, but this is very much science. Yeah.

[: 02:00:22

[02:00:27] Alicia Trusty: for sure. And it's with everything, right? Like water. Yeah. Um, like this is why I think getting out in the world and getting out in nature, like getting away from cars, getting away from machines is like really, like, not that, I mean, there are obviously certain machines that hold a certain purpose for healing, but um, like getting amongst trees, getting amongst like the wind, like the frequencies of sounds.

[: 02:00:50

[02:01:12] Right. So when we explore those and play with those, like, I think that's really cool to see. Um, that was actually something I didn't like every day in acting school, we warm up our sounds and like, we would do some weird shit. I gotta tell you, like, sometimes you'd walk into a room and be like some weird shit's going on in here, but here we go.

[: 02:01:30

[02:01:51] It totally makes sense. Um, I just had this like thought, have you seen the TikTok guy who like, I don't even know how he does it, but he [02:02:00] hooks these machines up to like this little thing up to plants and then like plays their frequency. Yeah. I've

[: 02:02:04

[02:02:11] Mm-hmm , that's another example of planned consciousness or fungal consciousness. Cuz the one I saw most recently was mushrooms. Yes. Doing it with like an oyster mushroom, but I can feel it. I don't even need that little machine. I could tell that these, these organisms have some form of consciousness that, that is different than ours, but oh for sure.

[: 02:02:30

[02:02:33] Alicia Trusty: Yeah. Very legitimate. You know, I like looked like a little crazy American when I was overseas. Like everywhere I went, I, I, my goal was to go to spiritual places and go to like ancient places. And um, I'm like really called to water and rocks and trees as well. Um, but like water and rocks, they speak to me.

[: 02:02:53

[02:03:09] I'm actually trying to head back in October, but like one of the most special places to me is whales is the coastline of whales Abers with whales. When I was there, um, like I felt so alive by the earth. I was like, I couldn't stop, like digging my hands in the soil. And, and like at the beach it's pebbles, it's not sand, it's like different rocks.

[: 02:03:33

[02:03:47] Jeff Nesbitt: Um, the resident frequency of that place with those rocks was just vibing with yours 100%.

[: 02:03:53

[02:04:09] Alicia Trusty: real. It is. It, it gives me, I like to hold my heart when something is like, like that truth.

[: 02:04:15

[02:04:23] Jeff Nesbitt: This has been a great conversation. Yeah. I feel, I feel a lot better. I've been, I've been lately. I've been just like dying for some esoteric talk.

[: 02:04:32

[02:04:38] Alicia Trusty: so. Which is great. It was really great. I thank you for having me. I'm

[: 02:04:41

[02:04:45] Alicia Trusty: mean, no, you know, just everybody needs to take care of themselves as much as they can love yourself.

[: 02:04:50

[02:04:53] Jeff Nesbitt: uncomfortable. All right, guys. Thank you so much for listening. Talk to you next time. Bye.[02:05:00]